Barry the Lonely Reindeer & His Bashful Elf is now up for pre-order on Amazon! It will officially be released on November 1st. All the players from past stories are back in all their glory, including Willy the elf who has a few issues with Barry’s ex. It’s never a good idea to call Willy the Chief’s little guy. 🙂 Check out a quickie and unedited excerpt with Willy and Mrs. Claus at the bottom of this post. I’ll add one with Barry and Ricky soon.
Thank you to everyone who has embraced my kooky version of the North Pole and who continue to ask for more. I hope you enjoy Barry and Ricky’s story.
From the world of Willy the Kinky Elf & His Bad-Ass Reindeer.
The North Pole isn’t exactly as it appears in fairy tales. It has the elves and Santa and his reindeer, but Santa and Mrs. Claus aren’t the jolly couple the world believes them to be. Far from it, actually. The reindeer are all shape-shifters who transform into gorgeous beings in human form and are respected by all.
Reindeer Barry Simpson leads a simple life. He works, comes home, then does it all again the next day. Once upon a time, he was outgoing and social. That changed after he became involved with an abusive reindeer. It’s been a year since Barry ran and he’s finally getting over his fears, eager to start living again.
Ricky is a shy elf who blushes at every turn. One accidental touch and Barry’s convinced he’s finally met his mate. He’s never been with an elf before but he knows in his heart that this is the man he’s been waiting for.
Between meddling parents, an overprotective brother, and even a sad Santa Claus, Barry and his elf are pulled in several directions. When his abusive ex-boyfriend starts getting violent, Barry has to fight to protect not only himself but also those he loves, including his newfound mate.
Approximately 51,000 words.
Available for pre-order for November 1, 2017 publication.
Together we walk along the sidewalk and down the streets of Santa’s Village, passing several people along the way. In front of the post office a group of elder elves separate for us to get through. I feel the same tingle in Ricky’s hand that I felt the first time we touched. I look down and can tell he feels it too.
We’ve not even walked a block when I hear Willy saying my name from somewhere behind us. We both stop and turn to look. Willy’s standing in the middle of the sidewalk, hands on his hips, yelling at Mrs. Claus.
“You can get your skanky ass out of my way.” He points in mine and Ricky’s direction. “Thanks to you I lost the reindeer.”
“Huh?” I ask just loud enough for Ricky to hear me.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, elf, but you’re blocking the sidewalk,” Mrs. Claus growls. “Either get out of my way or I’ll move you myself.”
“Just try it with your bimbo stiletto self.”
She leans down and gets in his face.
“Or, or, uh, I don’t know, but I’ll think of something. Or Randy will. Barry almost got kidnapped!”
I raise a brow.
“You’ve lost your mind, little boy.”
“And now the reindeer who was trying to do it is long gone. I was close enough to grab his back hoof until you got in my way. Now take your fake eyelashes and silicone and go back to where you’ve been hiding.”
I want to laugh but I know better. Not at the attempted kidnapping if that’s what it was, obviously, but at tiny Willy’s threats.
“Willy?” I call out.
He waves a hand, dismissing me.
“I got this, Barry. Your butt head ex is probably in the next county now, though, thanks to fake tits McGhee here.”
“My butt head ex?”
“He flew down and had his front hoofs out to grab you. He saw me going after him so he took off like the wimpy ass he is.” He points at Mrs. Claus. “Then Stripper Pole Claus here got in my way and I missed my chance of whooping reindeer butt – again.”
“Uh, thank you?” I say, still trying not to laugh.
“Nothin’ to it.”
“You need to remember who you’re talking to, elf,” Mrs. Claus says through gritted teeth, calling Willy’s attention back to her. “I don’t care that you’re sleeping with Randy. I can still destroy you.”
“The only thing you’re probably still capable of destroying is that overused vag of yours.”
“Oh, shit,” I mumble.
Thankfully, Derek shows up out of nowhere and gets between the elf and Santa’s wife.
“Mrs. Claus,” he says with a tip of his head. He gently turns Willy back toward the workshop. “Back to work for you. There’ll be other opportunities to kick reindeer butt.”
He doesn’t even attempt to hide his amusement. He sends a wave our way and the moment is gone. Willy is ushered back to work and Mrs. Claus stomps her six-inch stilettos and turns and walks the other direction.